So today Bob the burglar graduated from Prison University. As Bob walked out the gates, he felt the warmth of sun and smelled clean air for the first time in 5 years, which was better than the smells inside the prison (But we won't talk about that). As Bob walked down the road million thoughts ran threw his head. Bob stopped for a minute to figure his next plan. While sitting there he went through his stuff that the prison had giving him. found everything he came in with plus oddly enough he found $50 that he knew was not his. He quickly put it in his pocket and thought maybe thing were about to get better for him. After walking for serval hours Bob was back home once more. Not much had changed in Klien Texas since he had been gone. before he knew it, Bob was back at his home safe and sound.
The Next day Bob was feeling great, and he had already started to think about his next move. While he was eating at his favorite restaurant (the local Waffle house) he over head to men talking about a home they helped build for a millionaire. the two men talked about the electronic security systems and all the safeguards that were put in. Now bob being a burglar with new skills, so he made a plan to rob this new home and make a name for himself.
Late the next night, Bob put his plan in motion. He drove to the house, but at night all the houses look the same and he had forgotten to bring the house address with him. Finely after driving up and down the same street for over an hour, he decided he didn't to draw
attention to himself, so he parked the car right in front of the house he was going to rob. Bob used his knew ninja skills and creeped up to the gate at the house only to hear "Sir they are not home right now; they went out to dinner". Shocked that someone may have seen him he quickly turned around and saw an elderly couple walking not one but two of his worst nightmares, one very small dog which snarled at bob and a medium size cat that just staired at him. Bob felt that scary feeling he knew all too well come back to him. So, in a flash he waved hand at them and said, "You see nothing" and then took off running like he had done so many times before. The old man looked at his wife and said He must have been a Jedi and tried to use a Jedi mind trick on us. the man's wife said Ah how cute, wait tell our son Darth about it.
Bob quickly regained his composure and with even more determination he went back to the gate. He quickly passed thru the gate and using his ninja skills he learned he made his way up to the house. The whole house was quit and dark. Bob had seen a large box on the back of the house and knew the security system must be there. Bob opened the door to the electrical box and stood there stunned. the box was empty and there was a note that said they would hook things up tomorrow. Bob suddenly screamed joyfully and did a happy dance that would have made dancing with the stars happy. Bob made his way to the back door and knowing the security system was not hook up, he had no trouble opening the back door. As he went inside, he looked around, the house was perfect. Bob roamed around the first floor but did not find anything of value, not even a safe. So, Bob went upstairs to look around when he got to the top, he heard a voice say "Hello". Bob froze and thought not again. he turned slowly and with his flashlight he looked for someone, but no one was there. Get yourself together Bob said to himself, it's all in your mind. Bob kept looking but found nothing. Then he heard that voice again, this time it said, "Jesus is watching you" Bob froze in fear knowing this time it was not in his mind. Franticly Bob searched and searched for where that voice was coming from, but he could not find it. He then found an office upstairs; it was very nice.
The office had a big desk in the middle and a bunch of bookcases along one wall and thing on display along the other wall. Then he heard it again "Jesus is watching you" and at the same time Bob saw it. The safe he had been looking for. At this point Bob was determined to get what he was looking for. So, Bob yelled out to the voice and said Shut up and leave me alone. And immediately the Voice said "NO". Bob turned again and this he saw a parrot, Bob started laughing "I guess you're the one who has been talking to me"
the parrot said "yep". Bob still laughing turned back around to the safe, this time the flashlight shined on something so scary to Bob he could not speak. Standing right in front of him was the biggest, meanest dog Bob had ever seen. The dog was growling, and drool was dripping of the huge teeth. Suddenly the parrot said this is Jesus.
Bob let out a yell that the whole county could hear, Bob ran to the top of the stairs with the dog right behind and the parrot laughing the whole time. Bob knew he couldn't beat the huge dog that was right behind. Bob took a chance and leaped from the top of the stairs and grab the chandler which quickly broke and came crashing down. Bob stunned, got up and ran for the door. Once outside he was surprised to see a bunch of people laughing and cheering him on with the cops patiently waiting for him. Bob, now in a full panic with the dog so close to him he could smell the raw hamburger he had eaten earlier that day. Like an Olympic athlete, Bob made to the gate and leaped over it with three feet to spare and landed right in the back seat of the police car. the crowd cheered and laughed as the police drove off to take him to jail.
on the way to jail the officer asked Bob why he picked that house? Bob told him the whole story about the two-guy talking in the restaurant and the millionaire who lived there. The Officer started laughing so hard, Bob asked him what was so funny? The officer told Bob; you picked the wrong house. The millionaire lives next door. the house you broke into is not done yet.
Written by Eric
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